merry christmas from the borg

aol australia have a tasteful flash animation for the festive season – not sure why they have snow though since they are in the middle of summer at the moment. Anyways play at your own risk 🙂

christmas parties

free bar on a thursday night is just plain evil! and never ending champagne glasses are the gift of satan!

Now normally it is me who has to apologise after getting drunk and making a complete idiot of myself. [I’m sure I do still need to apologise to a few people – but less than after scally‘s birthday party] So it was quite a suprise to have 2 emails when I got in this morning apologising for things from last night, both from directors too – so I must have been either doing something right or something very very wrong!

I was made to blush last night – and that is normally a very difficult thing to do.

After getting fairly wasted and generally merry scally, rick, andrew and I hit McDonalds Drive Thru in wandsworth for munchies. 4 queens eating Maccy D’s [well only 3 actually as rick quite sensibly refused the evil food] in a car park is not the best look I can tell you.

Note to self: don’t get drunk

another note to self: don’t take glitter sticks to work parties

yet another note to self: don’t talk whilst drunk it only gets you into trouble

festive shag

last night in the pub we managed to discuss how shops are cashing in on christmas to the point of being absurd. Spence noticed sainsbury’s selling christmas scented bleach and then we decided in the style of turkey and stuffing crisps they could do turkey flavour condoms for when you are being stuffed with cranberry flavour lube. marketing mans dream us lot you know!

strange dreams

Sunday night I dreamt that jonathan & marky, scally & rick, spence & glen, nic & vianney with andrew, dave and myself in tow had gone to the supermarket to buy supplies for christmas as we were all spending it together at my parents house.

we were all arguing which spirits and champagne to buy and whether to fly to liverpool or get a train.

and then somehow we were already in liverpool and had ended up at a bowling alley playing in the dark with glowing bowling balls and lots of semi naked staff with there tops off with dodgy elevator muzac versions of christmas carols but with a distinctly almighty records kind of beat. the bar had a viewing gallery overlooking us and loads of my family were there watching us all play but they all had evening wear on and sipping champagne.
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You know sometimes you feel

You know sometimes you feel like the world is dumping on you from a great height. Today I have decided to get some of it off my chest as it is starting to eat away inside me and I’m sure that isn’t good for my karma.
A while a go a work colleague was stuck at very short notice for somewhere to stay over Christmas and New Year so I naturally offered my spare room until they got sorted [no rent or anything as this was a guy kicke out of his home] and the offer was until he found somewhere to stay.
So this was fine until he decided rather than look for somewhere to stay he would like to just rent the spare room from me. He was planning on leaving the country in June anyway so wouldn’t be able to get a lease for such a short period. By this time I was kind of used to him being around so we agreed a nominal rent [after all he had just had a child and needed his cash].

All ticked along with me not charging bills or anything as I would be paying them if I lived alone anyways and I was sure the extra gas and electricity would not amount to much. Now call me a mug but when he bought himself a new ?2k laptop I figured he had a loan or something or his folks had paid – as he was supposed to be broke. We did however revisit the subject of bills [especially as by this stage he had stopped contributing to groceries] and he agreed to pay towards [not half but an amount towards] the general bills in addition to his rent.
Now you may think I earn too much or something but he never contributed to the bills ever or the groceries since April and I never considered checking his rent was paying each month – what with travelling and expense claims and erratic payments into my account I just presumed he was paying. Now he moved out on Sunday and on the Friday I discovered he had not paid rent for basically the last 3 months – so now I am left feeling that you know he bought loads of cool new stuff whilst staying – new laptop, loads of new scuba gear and has now fucked off to work in the carribean leaving me out of pocket and depressed.
I keep thinking of all the things I could do with the money – like pay off credit cards or go on holiday or buy new sofa’s [since I have been without sofa’s since May]. I feel I should write him a mail but then think well fuck it it’s not like he is going to worry about it now he is in the carribean is it? I just feel completely drained and used and abused and wonder if I will ever be as welcoming into my home again.

well the alexander technique helped

well the alexander technique helped a lot actually – may try more of that tonight. just been invited to the boyz belated christmas party too 🙁 lloks like I will not be attending that one. It is a school night after all.

:) well had a nice

🙂 well had a nice night – didn’t actually make it to the gym. The lovely spence hadn’t managed to get his passport photo done. Which is good as it gave me the perfect excuse to back out of going along. I have managed another day without bowing to peer pressure.
One down side is I didn’t get to go for a drink with him either. Instead I was entertaining andrew and sprogg with a lovely fish casserole and a few very stressful games of Jenga – well actually a very cheap Czech version bought from one of the lovely christmas markets in the old town square a few years ago whilst visiting ff. It is made up of coloured blocks and has dice so you have to take a colour according to what you roll. We spent a very traumatic night playing it whilst drinking very cheap Czech vodka with lots of people. Anyways it was no less traumatic tonight – just easier because the thirteen year old always tends to lose. I mean they just go for the blocks no one else would try in a million years 😉
Looking forward to the burns supper tomorrow night at scally’s – my dad would be proud. Well actually he wouldn’t but then that’s another story. I wish I had continued to learn the bagpipes now – it would have been a great party trick. Instead I’ll just have to try and drag some tartan out the wardrobe and make small talk!

oh my god I am

oh my god I am so so poor 🙁 just checked my cahoot account and forgot we have had christmas etc this pay month. bummer.

I love the random emails

I love the random emails you get from friends. This one made me chuckle it is like a mini Darwin Awards.
3 people die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
142 people were injured in 1998 by not removing all pins from new shirts.
58 people are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of
screwdrivers.
31 people have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the
fairy lights were plugged in.
19 people have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas
decorations were chocolate.
Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling accidents.
101 people since 1997 have had to have broken-parts of plastic toys
pulled out of the soles of their feet.
18 people had serious burns in 1998 trying on a new jumper with a lit
cigarette in their mouth.
A massive 543 people were admitted to A&E in the last two years after
opening bottles of beer with their teeth.
5 people were injured last year in accidents involving out of control
Scalectrix cars.
And finally,
8 people cracked their skull in 1997 after falling asleep while throwing up
into the toilet.

Watch yourselves kiddies!!